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Combatting age shame

Age is nothing to be ashamed about. There I said it. But do you believe it? Combatting age shame is not that simple, unfortunately. We will need to tackle belief systems we have subscribed to in order to tweak our biases against ourselves.

Aging is a given.

Last week we talked about shame we might feel from our weight. This week I want to dig into the reasons we might have for shame behind our age. Trying to look the same all our days will set us up for shame. Everyone is going to age. Some might be able to age better than others but eventually the aging process affects us all. The thing is, beauty does not expire with age. The first bias we need to eradicate is the bias that aging is somehow embarrassing. If you have not had anyone laugh yet when you told them your age, or that you had just experienced a hot flash, you have not lived. The lens the culture views people through is a lens fixed on youth as the standard. But the Bible sees those who are older as of more value if they have grown in wisdom. “Wisdom belongs to the aged, and understanding to the old” (Job 12:12).

Aging is a gift.

To be able to be above ground rather than below it is an amazing gift from God! Somewhere we bought the lie that says aging decreases our worth. The second bias with age is that those who are older are incapable in various ways. Prepare yourself to be mocked by the younger generation when you forget a name or make a mistake. Such errors are chalked up to age, of course. Yet all ages forget names and make mistakes. Ok, I will admit it that aging will impact memory eventually. But again, there is no shame for this, as it happens eventually to all people. One thing we can do is go deeper as we grow older. Read more. Don’t check out because things get harder. And skip the shame when you make mistakes.

Age is just a number.

Our age indicates the number of years we have been blessed to be on this earth. How have we used those years? That speaks volumes more than just the length of our days. What difference have we made in the lives of others, how have we lived and served God? It seems numbers can induce shame on a scale and on a birthday cake. But truly, our worth has never been because of a number—it has only ever been because of our Savior.

Check out the Seeing Deep blog this week for a mindset hack to help you be grateful instead of shameful for your age.

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