I’m not proud of my behavior when my husband whooped me yet again in a game of Catan. Giving him the stank eye, I pouted and felt an offense rising within me. All over a game. As I said, I’m not proud of it. But seriously, all joking aside, this behavior showed me how easily offenses can rise, and it also revealed their source: pride. This small object lesson showed me that having a love that overcomes offenses would require laying down my pride.

Overcoming Offenses with Humility

Ouch. We probably do not think of ourselves as being prideful, but a lot of offenses stem from feeling minimized by others in some way. But what if in the face of humiliation we opted for a response of humility? What if we were to overlook an offense and choose love instead? Using an opposite response from our automatic fleshly reaction could dissolve offenses instead.

So, I tested this theory. I decided to celebrate my husband’s wins and to choose to be okay with him beating me. At first, it was hilarious, and my husband said it felt inauthentic. Ha ha. There is probably some truth there. But something started to happen—a shift in my spirit where I recognized I could choose to not be offended. I could be more than ok with not winning.

Overcoming Offenses with Putting Others First

This brings me to another win when it comes to laying down offenses. Let others win. Why not? There is something about wanting the best for someone else that ends up filling our hearts with joy. What if the world embraced this way of thinking? Instead of saying “why her or him?” when someone else succeeded, we would cheer them on instead.

We might be able to get rid of these minor offenses fairly easily and feel the weight of offenses lifting off our shoulders, but what about an offense when someone has hurt us?

Overcoming Offenses with Love

In a world where misunderstandings, harsh words, and disappointments are inevitable, offenses often seem unavoidable. Whether it’s a careless remark, a betrayal, or a deep wound from someone we trusted, offenses have the power to divide families, sever friendships, and even shake our faith. However, as followers of Christ, we are called to a higher standard—one of love that overcomes offenses.

Jesus Himself set the ultimate example of love in the face of offense. He was betrayed by a friend, falsely accused, mocked, and crucified—yet He chose love over retaliation. On the cross, He prayed for those who persecuted Him, saying, “Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing” (Luke 23:34, NIV). If Christ, in His suffering, could extend forgiveness and love, how much more should we as His followers?

The Bible reminds us in Proverbs 10:12, “Hatred stirs up conflict, but love covers over all wrongs.” When we allow love to take precedence over our wounds, we break the cycle of offense and bitterness.

Overcoming Offense Through Forgiveness

One of the most powerful ways to demonstrate Christlike love is through forgiveness. Forgiveness does not mean ignoring wrongdoing or pretending the pain doesn’t exist; rather, it means choosing to release the offense and trust God with justice.

Paul encourages us in Colossians 3:13:
“Bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against someone. Forgive as the Lord forgave you.”

Forgiveness frees us from the burden of resentment and allows God’s peace to rule in our hearts. Holding onto offense only hinders our spiritual growth, while choosing forgiveness aligns us with God’s heart.

Overcoming Offense by Loving the Offender

Love is more than just words—it requires action. Jesus commands us in Matthew 5:44, “Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you.” This is a radical love that defies human nature!

Here are some practical ways to walk in love despite offenses:

• Pray for those who hurt you. Asking God to bless them changes our hearts and aligns us with His perspective.
• Choose to speak life. Instead of gossiping or harboring resentment, speak words of kindness and truth.
• Extend grace. We have been forgiven much, so we should extend the same grace to others (Ephesians 4:32).
• Seek reconciliation. If possible, make peace with those who have offended you (Romans 12:18).
• Let go and trust God. Surrender the offense to the Lord, knowing that He sees and will bring justice in His time.Love has the power to heal wounds, restore relationships, and break the chains of bitterness. When we choose love over offense, we reflect the heart of Christ and draw others to Him.

Let us strive to be a people known for unshakable love—a love that covers offenses, forgives freely, and glorifies God in all circumstances.

Mindset Hack of the Week

What offenses can you forgive right now? Forgiveness does not mean we dismiss sin or egregious behavior. It means we don’t take it personally.

The mindset hack graphic this week is a reminder that we can choose to let go of offenses that are robbing us of joy. We can choose to think higher.

Check out the Shame Rx Blog this week as we discuss how shame impacts our relationships.

All for Jesus,

Denise